My blog is where I digest life, religion, school, and the conversations I have with my smart and wonderful friends!
July 31, 2013
July 23, 2013
What's in A Name?: The Story of the Abused Woman
After looking at some of the ethical issues
surrounding self-defense and violence against women (particularly sexual assault),
I would like to share with you a biblical story that I have really come to
treasure. I only started looking at this story differently earlier this year,
when it suddenly occurred to me that the way I was taught this story (and how
it continues to be taught) might be way off the mark – John 8:1-11.
“Jesus
returned to the Mount of Olives, 2 but early the next morning he was back again at the Temple. A
crowd soon gathered, and he sat down and taught them. 3 As he was speaking, the teachers of religious law and the
Pharisees brought a woman who had been caught in the act of adultery. They put
her in front of the crowd.4 “Teacher,” they said to Jesus, “this woman was caught in the act
of adultery. 5 The law of Moses says to stone her. What do you say?”6 They were trying to trap him into saying something they could use
against him, but Jesus stooped down and wrote in the dust with his finger. 7 They kept demanding an answer, so he stood up again and said, “All right, but let the one who has never sinned throw the first
stone!”8 Then he stooped down again and wrote in the dust.9 When the accusers heard this, they slipped away one by one,
beginning with the oldest, until only Jesus was left in the middle of the crowd
with the woman. 10 Then Jesus stood up again and said to the woman, “Where are your accusers? Didn’t even one of them condemn you?”11 “No, Lord,” she said.And Jesus said, “Neither do I. Go and sin no more”
(New Living Translation).
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Image: Woman Caught in Adultery, John Martin Borg, 2002 |
still
there are days
when there is no way
not even a chance
that i'd dare for even a second
glance at the reflection of m body in the mirror
and she knows why
like I know why
she only cries
when she feels like she's about to lose control
she knows how much control is worth
knows what a woman can lose
when her power is taken away
by a grip so thick with hate
it could clip the wings of an angel
leave the next eight generations of your blood shaking
and tonight something inside me is breaking
my heart beating so deep beneath the sheep of her pain
i could give every tear she's crying a year - a name
and a face i'd forever erase from her mind if i could
just like she would
for me
or you
but how much closer to free would any of us be
if even a few of us forgot
what too many women in this world cannot
and i'm thinking
what would you tell your daughter
your someday daughter
when you'd have to hold her beautiful face
to the beat up face of this place
that hasn't learned the meaning of
STOP
walking to your car alone
get the keys in the lock
please please please please open
like already you can feel
that five fingered noose around your neck
two hundred pounds of hatred
digging graves into the sacred soil of your flesh
please please please please open
already you're chocking for your breath
listening for the broke record of the defense
answer the question
answer the question
answer the question miss
why am i on trial for this
would you talk to your daughter
your sister your mother like this
i am generation of daughters sisters mothers
our bodies battlefields
war grounds
beneath the weapons of your brother's hands
do you known they've found land mines
in broken women's souls
black holes in the parts of their hearts
that once sand symphonies of creation
bright as the light on infinity's halo
she says
i remember the way love
used to glow like glitter on my skin
before he made his way in
now every tough feels like a sin
please
bruises on her knees from praying to forget
she's heard stories of vietnam vets
who can still feel the tingling of their amputated limbs
she's wondering how many women are walking around this world
feeling the tingling of their amputated wings
remembering what it was to fly to sing
(By: Andrea Gibson http://www.endthesilencecampaign.org/poetry/andrea-gibson/blue-blanket/)
The abuse of
the young woman captured in this poem speaks to the experience of the woman who
is commonly referred to as “the adulterous woman in John 8.” We already labeled
this woman, we have already given her a name. But she has no name in the story.
She could just as easily be described as the abused woman. The wretched woman.
The used woman. The story of the abused woman begins while Jesus is teaching
and a group of religious leaders burst onto the scene, bringing the woman and
force her to stand, shamed and disgraced, in front of the entire crowd.
_____________________________
Over the next
week or two, I want to continue looking at this story in a new light.
July 18, 2013
Women and Self Defense: Living in the Not Yet
One aspect of exploring peace, violence, and
self-defense is clear – it is difficult to have a black and white answer if you
are attempting to answer honestly both Scripture as well as experience (fear of
assault, the desire to protect others, etc.). There are myriads of grey
areas and numerous questions with no easy answers. I still have lingering
doubts and uncertainties about this problem that has haunted me for years.
For example, it is difficult to tell a woman who has experienced rape
that she must love her enemy. On the other hand, it is problematic to
take only yourself into consideration and not the New Testament ethic of
concern for your neighbors and enemies. It is a difficult balancing act
and I doubt that I will ever be completely at peace with it. For example,
shouldn't I be striving to meet the ideals of God’s kingdom though it is not
yet fully present? Is it possible to come to an agreement on when
it is proper to use violence and when it is not? Is the “middle ground” I
am treading on actually possible to reach a consensus on? Is it all too
subjective when it is justifiable to use violence and when it is not? Is
any situation where a woman experiences fear grounds for violence? For
example, if my purse is stolen, is it justifiable to use self-defense?
Alternatively, should self-defense be used solely when bodily harm is
threatened by an assailant? How does one know for
certain beforehand whether to use violence or not?
A person also has
the issue of control. When engaging in violence, you can never be sure of
the outcome. It is very easy to harm an attacker more than intended or
for some other unforeseeable event to occur. Additionally, where do
you draw the line on how much violence to use? Many people are perfectly
content with using guns while others desire to use less lethal methods (As I’ve
mentioned before, I am uncomfortable with guns – they are simply too lethal for
me to feel morally comfortable with). However, there is again the
difficulty of never knowing when an act may be deadly. I am left in
the precarious position of balancing both love for enemy and love for
self. Until violence is done away with and God reigns fully
among God’s people, this tension will exist. Then, God “will wipe every
tear from their eyes, and there will be no more death or sorrow or crying or
pain. All these things are gone forever” (Revelation 21:1-4).
One “cannot
live responsibly by a love which is abstracted and divorced from justice, and
from the rational and structural elements which constitute justice…but must be
held together in unity of their polar tensions.” It is within these
tensions that I find the answer to my question. I will seek to always
love others, but there are some situations where the most loving act for all
involved is to use controlled self-defense to stop the assault. Even more
importantly, I will work to hone my skills in preventing violence (and
promoting peace), because violence is always a sad and terrible
thing, even if it helps others and is a lesser evil. I recognize this
as part of the narrative of Scripture. We live in a time between Eden and
the New Jerusalem – there is sin, violence, hatred, and a world full of
pain. I acknowledge the need for protecting the vulnerable from the
powerful until that time. I also recognize that violence belongs to this
time of chaos and not to the time of the New Jerusalem. We live in the Not Yet - God's Kingdom has not yet fully come. Avoiding assault
through self-defense may be the lesser evil, but it still is tainted – it is
not the ideal. I long for the days when people can live together
peaceably in the New Jerusalem. But that time has not yet arrived. Nonetheless, I yearn for this time of peace and safety, when women no longer have to worry about rape and sexual assault. One day I will stop looking over my shoulder and viewing most males as a potential threat. Until that time, I will continue to wade through the murky waters of loving others but using restrained violence (if absolutely necessary) in order to stop this epidemic that plagues women the world over.
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July 9, 2013
The Good, the Bad, and the Kingdom of God: Narratives and Responsibility in a Violent Assault
When I look back at what it is that bothers me so much about self-defense, I find that I am torn between caring for myself (or others) and the larger narrative of the kingdom of God. The narrative of the kingdom of God is the larger framework in which I view the world; it is the lens through which I see the world. However, I combine this picture of what the kingdom of God means with the ethic of responsibility to self and others in order to help figure out what on earth the ethics of the kingdom of God looks like in various situations.
The Narrative of the Kingdom of God
Narrative ethics sets the stage for my concern
about self and others. Here, I ask
myself “Who am I becoming? Who are we
becoming?” and what do my actions contribute to the larger world narrative.
This was the question that triggered my quandary– I did not want to be a
violent person. I became concerned that my obsession for personal safety was so
inwardly focused that it was making me become a person I did not want to be (as
a side note, you can practice self-defense but you must consider the effect is
has on you and the world. This is where I began to run into problems). It is not a list of rules that appeal to me
and set my morals, but the vision of God’s kingdom. God’s kingdom is not
centered around doing what is best for me and mind. There is a much larger picture
that sets the story for our interactions with the world. Hauerwas writes, “to be Christian is not principally to obey certain
commandments or rules, but to learn to grow into the story of Jesus as the form
of God’s kingdom. We express that by
saying we must learn to be disciples.”
What we ought to do must be connected to who we are and the story that
we are a part of. “Through story, we
interpret, evaluate, and envision the world – and determine our roles and
responsibilities within it.”
![](https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg7ovXMRhG5T70nFuGlHYsyT-sHZxturDVq6dsJDNfA_vTNqP5b9XyXz1W5TtPDpaTEgofHXhZ8bQWPgpxUllg0EasHgikUGSb-gMUIU22bprk5KIEQKjYJz6-da3v7nE4YVy6u60iBTJ8/s320/he_qi_good_samaritan.jpg)
One idea that is vital to
me is the interconnectedness of all people.
There is an overarching story that is seen throughout the Bible and
especially in the Gospel. Ideas from the
Christian narrative that are central to this narrative are that we are all
sinners and live in a fallen world. This
does not excuse criminal activity and harming others, but it does help
understand how we are connected. Many
people create a binary of good and bad people, but we are each marred by sin. We
each have our own life and background that creates a complicated picture of
every person. Additionally, the idea
that Christ can redeem and save even the darkest of hearts is important – our binary
of good people and bad people is again challenged if we believe that God’s forgiveness
is open to every “bad person.” We are to
model ourselves after Christ, who sees each of us a potential member of the
Kingdom of God. Finally, all human life
is important and each person is made in the image of God. These few ideas are
what I see and think of when I think of the Kingdom of God as being the
background to our lives.
I frame
my life in this overarching storyline. I
believe who I am and what I do contributes to that story, and that this
narrative should affect me and all of my actions. However, what this looks like can be
different depending on who is telling the story. The “law of love” is
interpreted differently by every person.
The law
of love is too general to tell us when we ought to do what a commandment tells
us not to do. We need more than love,
say, to tell us when we “ought” to shoot a human being. We need solid evidence that it is necessary
to break a commandment in order to respect both the rights and needs of someone
for whom we are responsible. We need a reasonable indication that breaking a
commandment will serve the cause of justice as well as the law of love.[1]
The second idea I want to use to help guide the
narrative and the role I play in it is the idea of responsibility.
Adding a Dash of Responsibility to the Law of
Love
The narrative of Christianity leaves us with a
very broad set of ethics. Adding the
idea of responsibility helps to refine our personal roles in the larger
narrative into manageable portions. An
ethic of responsibility focuses on the response we give to action upon us, but
it also looks at the larger ramifications of our actions. It seeks to balance the interests of the
larger narrative as well as the individual players.
In my moral dilemma, the question arises as to
whom I responsible to in a dangerous situation?
My initial instinct is to take care of myself; however, the narrative ethic
I looked at above demands that I also consider everyone involved – including the
assailant. While seeking various
perspectives on this issue, I have become frustrated by the false dichotomy
that many make: if you are a pacifist, you are faithful to the gospel but
irresponsible socially and if you are for violent intervention, you are being
unfaithful to the gospel but acting responsibly.[2] I have a
responsibility to consider my enemy, but I can also protest against sexual
assault. If one contends for even a
minimal amount of consideration towards one’s neighbors, then one has the
responsibility to do the least amount of harm in order to escape to
safety. This does not mean that no
offensive actions can be taken, but it does restrict what self-defense one can
use (shooting to kill, for example, should not be one’s first response).
Since one has a responsibility to one’s enemy,
one of the most important practices to cultivate is preventative self-defense.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that each person has a moral
obligation to cultivate these skills. These include things such as being aware
of one’s surroundings, keeping doors locked, and not walking alone. People (and
I am especially calling out all WOMEN to look out for one another) must realize
that these little precautions may be what saves her from walking into a
potentially dangerous situation where violence, assault, and even death can
occur. If a confrontation does arise,
attracting attention to your situation and showing that you are willing to put
up a fight are often all one needs to scare off an attacker (as I did in the
story I shared in my last post). The
last resort should be physical violence, BUT it is an ethically acceptable step
to keep one safe as well as to keep the assailant from harming himself. Intervening with a controlled amount of
violence in dangerous situations is taking responsibility for self as well as
the assailant.
In sum, this is a difficult decision on “how to
incorporate what we believe love and justice together dictate,” but never to
separate the two. I deeply desire and
long for the day when violence is no longer needed. Until that time, I will use non-violent but
active methods of self-defense in the majority of situations; I will
continually train in prevention as an act of love to myself and to my enemies.
However, I am not unfaithful to the gospel or unethical if the need for
self-defense does arise and I use a controlled amount of force to stop the situation.
[1] As a side note, I am really
uncomfortable with killing as a morally justifiable or even a morally laudable
action. However, this quote can be
applied to self-defense and responsibility in general. Guns are still a twisted
moral knot I am trying to untie, but I do not include them in my definition of
self-defense because they are simply too deadly. As I mentioned in my last blog, this has
absolutely nothing to do with laws or rights. This is a moral issue that I am
trying to work out. The law says I may own a gun, but I am not convinced
that it is morally justifiable at this point. My thoughts may change on the
subject (they are constantly turning over the moral implications of carrying a
gun), but that is where I am at right now. I cannot morally justify owning a
gun to myself. It conflicts too greatly with my responsibility to love my
neighbor and love my enemy.
[2] At a recent conference, one
of my past professors, David Matson, argued against the popular pacifist
movements in many churches and denominations.
While we may strive for peace, refusing to intervene may actually be
perpetrating more violence. The example
he used was whether or not a pacifist should intervene if a woman is
going to be raped. He argued that not acting would be causing more violence
than forcibly stopping the rape. However, it is
important to also remember that not all situations are best handled with
violence. In my last post, I shared a terrifying ordeal I had with a dangerous
stranger in a parking lot. It would have been irresponsible and much more
dangerous to have used physical violence in that situation instead of yelling
at the guy. Violence is ALWAYS dangerous (to everyone involved) and should
ALWAYS be a last resort.
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